this is how it goes

Life seems to have settled into a routine. work, sleep, repeat, spend the weekend cleaning and getting settled. This week that was interrupted a bit when I became fixated on my dining room. This is what it looks like right now.

Empty. And I am in the process of planning what I want it to look like. For the longest time I didn't think we needed a dining room, we were gonna have 2 sitting rooms, but then last Sunday we had people over and our 4 chairs didn't fit everyone. The thought of a regular dining set from the furniture store is NOT exciting to me. Plus the cost. Booo. And then! It came to me. Thrift stores. Antique stores. Mismatched chairs. Comfort. Color.

I cannot WAIT to get this dining room put together. We have space, it's 15x20. I measured. Jodie claims she "failed out of design school" - I think she changed her mind, either way, she's got the skills, I have the half baked vision, FUN.

Anything to keep my mind off last year. (what? where'd that come from?)

Which is interesting because in some other areas of life I am all about "feeling" this week. Feel the pain, feel the feeling, go through it, give it to God, grow. Maybe that's the difference. I don't know how I will grow through feeling the pain of my dead baby...it's just always there. Or maybe my brain/self/heart can only feel so much pain and it has to be compartmentalized a bit.

My brain is a mess lately. I mean that in the kindest way. I am living life, doing well, and then at night...my brain won't stop and I'm having all these super clear dreams where I process through life the way I won't let myself during the awake hours. Does that make sense to anyone else?

The dining room, it's gonna be cozy, comfortable, and welcoming. I don't know what I'll put in the buffet that I'm picturing but it will be beautiful. With a big crazy mirror hanging above it...I can't wait to see what treasures New Orleans has for my space.