in case you missed it

that's our newest photo of handsome baby J on the sidebar

looks like a strong possibility he's got Sammy's cheeks

Weekends are for baby

Here is the cast of characters. The dresser (that I had), the cupboard, the lamp shade-to-be-mobile, and an old window frame. The last three we found last weekend at an antique store in the French Quarter.

There is a definite switch in my mind. Sunday night - time to start thinking about school. Friday night - time to start thinking and planning for baby. This almost caused me to miss out on ordering my fabric but Tuesday I committed and here's what I got:

Michael Miller - Stripe, Feeling Groovy, and Zoology in Charcoal

It's more muted than I expected, the yellow looks a little brighter in pictures than in person. That convinced me that I could commit to turquoise furniture :-) So today I bought some Anne Sloan Chalk Paint in Provence (sp?). It almost perfectly matches turquoise in the fabric. Dresser drawers have been painted! Pictures of that to come once they have dried.

Here is the ginormous lamp shade I found last week, after 1 hour of deconstruction. I'm not exactly sure what I'm going to do with it to "mobilize" it...some felt, some fabric...maybe some paint on the frame, maybe some yarn in coordinating colors...still waiting for the perfect inspiration.

little words

2 posts in one day? For real.

In vs For

"in everything give thanks" 1 Thess 5:18

I've tried to articulate the point I heard on the radio Wednesday but this dude had it down. I am not thankful *for* every circumstance or thing that has come my way. No indeed. If you're honest, you would say the same. Some things just suck. But. I can be thankful *in* every circumstance for something.

SMH - try and tell me God doesn't care about the little things...

*Thanksgiving 2010 I started my first flour sack towel with the word gratitude on it. I saw the word on Etsy on some craft and it stuck with me.

*Spring 2011 I started reading One Thousand Gifts by Ann Voskamp. It's all about gratitude. It's a heady read, but so worth it.

*My counselor's advice on getting through tough moments? Think of 5 things you're thankful for.

I cannot escape the concept. I cannot stop making flour sack towels without the word gratitude on them. I've added the word choose. Choose gratitude. There has to be something in life to be thankful for. Dig deep if you have to.

"in everything give thanks" - it'll change your life.

ideas, ideas, & an update

Here's where I tell you about how I've spent my weekends focusing on things of little importance but things of great fun for me. *smile* I've been thinking a lot about the baby's room. I do enjoy a nice coordinated room, but really my style is more eclectic. This is obvious to me in the *hopefully working* collage picture below.

You can see the color of the walls in a couple of the pictures and I tried to make the background match a bit...taupe. I really like Michael Miller's Sea color palate (that's the fabric in the picture below). But of course I have other things that I love and want to hang up that don't exactly match *shrug* it's a plan, it can change. Did I say eclectic yet?

That's a dresser that I started painting a few years ago, hoping it would end up in a baby's room. I gave it away last summer and then got it back recently. The drawers are still brown and hopefully will be painted in the next few weeks to match something in the room.

On the dresser are a couple old t-shirts that I decided I shouldn't wear anymore, but were too fun to throw, so I framed them and they will hang on the wall. The little blue bags hold felt balls that I want to use in the mobile? possibly? with the yellow felt yarn (Anthro clearance rack finds). That's a fox. It's super soft, same brand as Sammy's gator and kinda the same color as Sammy's hair. We couldn't pass it up.

What's that? A random red J? Well, you see, at the same Anthro after Christmas sale they had their ornaments on sale so, just in case, I bought a *sale priced* J. We have not settled on a name, but J names seem to appeal to both Dave and I so...it'll be on the tree with Sammy's S eventually, if we do indeed land on a J name. Glad I didn't by the M in November, at full price, when I was convinced baby boy was a girl.

That's what we have so far. I have lots more ideas though! We're going out to troll some antique shops and thrift stores today. I would love to find a lamp shade to repurpose and a wardrobe to fix up. I will be looking for a sweet window frame to showcase some of those fabrics and maybe some modern/cute/boy graphic art.

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We have another ultrasound next week - can't wait to see baby boy again. Hopefully he'll be turned face up so we can see his profile. I'll only be 27 weeks so I don't have high hopes for chubby cheeks but! that'd be nice to see too.

I don't know if I've mentioned it here but when I wake up at night to turn over or something, I have been purposeful about thanking God for the good sleep I was getting. Thursday night, 5 hours straight! And then last night, up every 1-1.5 hours to pee. I've also been having this pain in my butt. I self diagnosed posterior pelvic pain because it wasn't shooting down my legs (sciatica does that) but Dr. v burst my bubble on Thursday. It is, indeed, sciatica. Nothing to do but wait for it to go away. And then! Amy took that burst bubble and rubbed it in my face...she had to deal with sciatica for 8-10 months after her Avery was born. Pregnancy is not for wimps. Just sayin'.

Overall though, I'm feeling good. Excited to hold my boy and trying to enjoy making choices based on what *I* want for the next 13-14 weeks.

watermelon airheads and chocolate milk

These are not items that I *wanted* to consume at 2am this morning but when your fridge is as jumbled as mine, that's you get when you're looking for a sugar rush.

I feel this little dude kicking, turning, and moving around pretty often. And I know too many people with sad stories...so when I woke up at 2am and realized I hadn't felt him since approximately 7:30pm I started to get worried. I tried to stay calm but my mind just ran away with worst case scenario's.

So I found myself in the kitchen at 2am looking for sugar. Watermelon Airheads and chocolate milk where what I found...it's what I ate as I named my baby, wondered how I could return to my job again being "that lady" who has lost 2 babies, felt sad about the planning we've done (the few items we have and the registry that is started), and poked my belly which just felt squishy and fat.

I went back to bed and laid on my back. Within a couple minutes he thumped, I was relieved, and now wide awake from worry and sugar. After breakfast this morning, he was a busy little guy, probably thanking me for the midnight snack.

*sigh*

The worry. I don't like it. But I'm the girl who's faced a couple years of "that won't happen to ME" situations. Why should 2012 be any different?

I find myself trying to balance it all. Feel my feelings AND keep a level head. Hope but not *too* much (so if the hopes are dashed it doesn't crush me).

It's kind of exhausting.

2 years ago...

...I woke, peed on a stick, and saw the + sign.

*smile* today I think fondly back to that morning and my time with my 1st boy. Those first two days were full of secret smiles about being pregnant until I spilled to my good friend/coworker. Looking back, life seemed simple. Lots can happen in 2 years.

I'm 24 weeks! And according to bone measurements from our last ultrasound our boy is measuring 1 week ahead. He was still hiding his face so we haven't gotten a good profile picture...only good pictures of his bottom half and his boy parts.

I usually wake up a few times at night and lately I make sure to send up a "thank you" prayer for the good sleep that I am getting. Soon enough I know sleeping will get difficult. I also started banging my belly on stuff last week. Apparently I've grown a bit lately and I am not aware of the space I am taking up these days :-)

Baby boy seems much more active than Sammy was. I thought Sammy moved a lot...not sure that my memory is really something I should rely on at this time though. My mind is fully scrambled from growing this little guy. Just when I've convinced myself I know something (that we need milk at home) it turns out I was wrong (which was a sad waste of 2 trips to the store to get milk). And, fittingly, I can't remember the other mind blanks I've had, but I know they've happened.

Last week was the week of people asking "What are you going to do with the baby when you go back to work in the fall (or late summer)?" So by Saturday I woke up thinking about a whole bunch of unanswered questions and concerns...nerves about little details that won't be worked out for months...cloth diapers? When/how to start pumping for my return to work? It led to a productive and confusing morning spent online looking into some of these details.

As for my tastes - they change with the New Orleans winter weather. At first I didn't desire or have a taste for sweets...yummm. I went through a sunflower seed phase, dill pickle flavor to be precise, and that has ended. When I'm hungry, it's time to eat. This week it's been peanut butter and jelly for breakfast - makes me hungry thinking about it. I've gained 11 pounds so far and really want to slow down the gain. I only gained 15 with Sammy! And I've got 3+ months to go! I'm trying to add some exercise into my schedule but I've self diagnosed "posterior pelvic pain" which can be made worse by standing too long...sitting on a hard chair too long...walking...so that's throwing a wrench in those plans. The pain goes away though so if I walk at the end of the day I should be able to sleep it off by the next morning.

I'm going to try and update more often - especially as we keep preparing the house for baby, hopefully choosing a name, and making all these plans...